"I Am Living in an Adulterous Marriage, Should I Divorce?"

By David J. Stewart

       I recently received a letter from a gentleman (whom I'll call John) who said he's worried, because he's living in an "adulterous relationship." He's afraid that God will judge Him severally if he continues in his "adulterous relationship" (emphasis his). John said he had counseled with other pastors who advised him to break up his marriage and file for divorce because he is living in adultery.

John said that his present wife had sinfully divorced her husband 10-years prior, who has since remarried and moved on with his life, so she cannot go back to him. John says he wasn't a Christian at the time he married his present wife and now realizes that he committed adultery by marrying her according to Matthew 5:32 in the Bible.

John asked for my Biblical opinion and here is the reply I sent to him...

You married her, so that's a done deal. I am not advocating adultery, but the best thing you can do is to finish what you started and not commit the same sin again. If you leave her, you will commit adultery again, because God forbids you to put her away (Matthew 5:32). You will also cause her to commit more adultery. The damage is done, you both shouldn't have been married to begin with, but you did it, and now you both should live for the Lord and not sin any further.

King David had no business committing adultery with Bathsheba, and she cheated on her husband. David killed Uriah, her husband. Bathsheba was pregnant with David's child. What a mess! David continued his "adulterous relationship" with Bathsheba after the sins were all said and done. You are in the exact situation and I think you ought to do what David did, finish what you started. Although the first child died, David and Bathsheba went on to have another child, Solomon. David didn't divorce Bathsheba; rather, he finished what he had started because Bathsheba had no husband to return home to. Your wife's former husband has remarried and it is too late for her to return. You should finish what you've started and honor your present wedding vows.

There is a Scripture in the Bible that says, "For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged" (1st Corinthians). David acknowledged his sins and cried out to God for forgiveness. David vowed not to commit the same sins again and he didn't. This is the example you should follow.

Kindest regards,

David J. Stewart


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